Dear Tofoboots, You’ve talked shit about me for a year and a half now - you need to find a new hobby. Also, you should stop answering for me and trying to speak for me and instead respond with: “Why don’t you talk to him and get to know him before judging him.” You aren’t giving me a chance. I don’t know who you are or what you are about and I don’t sit around on the Internet trying to pick apart any little thing you say and I don’t try to accuse you of different things. I have let you speak for yourself but now it’s going to far. Now it’s time for me to pick apart what you have said in order to defend myself. I’ve tried to make peace with you many times but you have denied it. I will still make peace with you when you are ready - no matter how deep you try to push me into the ground. Please do not read this message with anger - I am not angry. I am just annoyed and I know that I need to defend myself. Also, to anyone reading this, please DO NOT send tofoboots any hate mail or any asks that are negative, angry, or un-peaceful. I do not want to hurt anyone and I don’t want you to hurt anyone - no matter how nasty and untrue they are being.
“He doesn’t think white privilege exists.” - I know that white privilege exists and I know that I have white privilege. I hate that different races have “privileges” over each other and I will do anything I can to use my privilege in a positive way to make everyone equal. I believe in equality - I always have and I always will. And I will always treat everyone equally and with respect.
“He thinks that ‘every race has it’s own privilege’” - yeah, I do but in some races and places it’s not significant privilege because other races have superiority. It cancels out some times. However, I do believe that most individuals have some sort of privilege (not really speaking about race) - big or small.
“He fails to understand why PoC have issues with him appropriating dreadlocks as a middle class white kid.” - Alright, so you are telling me that I am not allowed to wear my hair the way it naturally has formed because I am white? Well, that sounds racist to me. I didn’t use chemicals to get my hair the way it is. I backcombed and let it be. Lots of Italians have dreadlocks - have you touched my hair? Have you not seen how thick my hair was before it was in dread locks? I’m not wearing a wig. I’m not using chemicals. My hair is natural and for you to tell me that because of the color of my skin that I cannot wear my hair the way it naturally goes, is flat out rude and racist. No matter how hard you try - I will NOT cut my hair. I got shit before I had dreads that “trans guys can’t have long hair” blah blah blah. Give me a break - It’s my hair, my body, let me be. I’m sorry if my hair offends you just because I happen to be white. What if I told you that you cannot eat Pizza or pasta anymore because “my people” made that and you aren’t Italian? What if you wanted to practice TaeKwondo and they said “No sorry, only Koreans can practice martial arts.” That’s called racism and we live in America where we are supposed to be fusing our cultures together so we can appreciate each culture and get closer to equality.
“Most currently he thinks there is a such thing as ‘heterophobia’” That’s a misquote because I’m pretty sure that I spelled it like this: “hetero-phobia” as in it’s not even a real word. However, I’ve met many, many gay people that absolutely hate straight people. Someone I used to know from the LI LGBT Center used to refer to straight people as “breeders” in a voice of disgust. One of my friends used to be terrified of my dad because he is a straight cis-male. I don’t think it’s a crisis but you cannot conquer hate with hate. You shouldn’t try to oppress someone else - you should try to make everyone equal. Make it positive, not negative.
“So he gets all this great social media attention” - This just sounds like you are incredibly jealous that I have gotten social media attention. You should ask me how I got on the Larry King Show & Tyra Banks Show. It was because I spent 5 days a week at the Long Island Gay Center advocating for LGBT Rights and working really hard to make youth comfortable in other schools. I volunteered 5 days a week in order to do this and I was recognized for doing that. I was 13 when I started. I didn’t go out looking to be on TV or looking to be in magazines - I never submitted a thing. I was chosen and picked. I didn’t go looking for them, they came looking for me. I am very “lucky” to have been chosen but I did work my ass off in order to get where I am.
The last bit of the 1st paragraph into “of a middle class white trans* kid. That’s his target and only audience.” I’m guessing that you haven’t been to any of my speeches, I’m guessing you haven’t even researched the areas that I have been to. I’m spoken to all types of people - young, old, from all different races, from all different backgrounds. My mission when I go into schools is to get people to understand what it’s like to be different - any type of different and then not to bully based on that. I know what it’s like to be mis-treated in school, school is hard enough time as it is. I don’t want kids to go through what I went through - any kids. Also, if you think that my only audience is a middle class white trans* kid, I’m sure that hundreds of people can stand up and tell you that they do not fit into that category at all. I guess you must have missed my concert in Reading, PA (which was definitely one of the best experiences of my entire life) - not one person in that audience of over 100 people were middle class white trans* kid. Look up Reading, PA if you are unfamiliar. Figure me out a little bit more before you try and say who my audience is. You are completely wrong with your statement.
This 2nd paragraph has nothing to do with me but I totally agree with you. Yeah, there are so many activists who get 0 to little attention. I always encourage everyone to stand up and am willing to help anyone to stand up to fight for LGBT rights and equality. I wish more people were able to stand up. The more voices speaking for the community the more accurate and the closer peace and equality will come.
Anyway, please stop talking shit about me and anyone else. If you want to make peace with me, please do, I encourage you to, I’m a nice kid, and I’m not trying to hurt anyone. I’m only trying to help. Message me anytime to make peace - I hope that you do. I wish you the best. Sincerely, Ryan.
Enter the Out in Schools 2013 Rise Against Homophobia youth short video contest for your chance to WIN cash prizes of up to $2,500! Youth from across Canada, aged 12 – 19, are being called to action to create a 30 – 60 second public service announcement video that challenges homophobia and bullying!
Use your digital camera, smart phone or any other device to produce a PSA message that promotes safer and diverse communities by addressing any of the following themes:
- Proud to be me
- Exploring gender stereotypes
- You Can Play: Supporting LGBTQ athletes
- Building diverse communities
- Language that hurts: Real time or online (cyber-bullying)
- Or any ideas that speak out against homophobia, transphobia and bullying!
Submit your film online by June 10, 2013 for your chance to win. Visit 2013 Contest Rules for competition details and Video Tips to learn more about how to make a great video. You can also check out previous winners on our YouTube channel! Email us at firstname.lastname@example.org if you have any questions, and follow the Twitter conversation on #RAH2013.
FREE CONFERENCE & MUSIC! #trans #music #speech
This SATURDAY in MAINE! Open to the public!
IS YOUR SCHOOL BEHIND THE TIMES? DO YOU WISH YOUR SCHOOL WAS MORE INCLUSIVE OF LESBIAN-GAY-BISEXUAL-TRANSGENDER-QUEER PEOPLE?
Have Ryan Cassata present at your school!
- The Transgender 101 presentation consists of Ryan Cassata’s personal coming out story from lesbian to transgender man along with the battles Cassata faced in High School. Ryan shares his story through words and through original song. This workshop will also include a detailed explanation of transgender key terms. -
Presentation Topics Include:
- creating positive change in your school/community
- coming out to parents/friends/family
- coming out in school
- gender dysphoria
- bullying and it’s negative affects
- struggles as a trans* student & how to overcome
- surgeries & hormones & legal name change
- transgender & the media
- suicides in the LGBT community
- Q&A session
- original music
- trans* vocabulary & terms
GOALS: The goals of this presentation are to educate and inform others about the transgender and gender variant community. This workshop will provide insight to what it’s like to be transgender. This presentation will inspire others to stand up against bullying. Audience members will be provided with enough information to clearly explain gender difference to those who do not understand it. This will help the transgender community in the fight for equality. Lastly this workshop will help transgender people to come out and gain the confidence they need to succeed. This workshop will give all people (trans or not) hope to make positive change and live a happier and healthier life.
Who is Ryan Cassata?
Ryan Cassata, age 19, has dedicated his life to bring equality to the transgender community. Ryan believes that by educating and by being open about his personal story he could successfully raise awareness for the transgender community and bring peace closer. Cassata has been speaking at schools and conferences since the young age of fourteen. Since then Ryan has shared his story with thousands, written music for film, played the world’s biggest lesbian, gay, bisexual, and transgender music festivals, and appeared on the Larry King Live Show & The Tyra Banks Show. Ryan Cassata was selected to speak at the biggest transgender conference in the US, the Philadelphia Trans-Health Conference, becoming the youngest speaker to ever take the keynote role. Cassata won the Harvey Milk Memorial Award for the positive change he made in his high school and community.
(Include your first name, school name and location in the email)
Music video by Ryan Cassata performing Hands of Hate. ©: 2012 Artemendous Records, LLC.
People joining hands while I was singing “Hands of Hate” at Long Island PrideFest
Here is my keynote address from the Philadelphia Trans-Health Conference. My speech covers; sexism, privilege, transmasculine, difference, equality, and recognizing the fact that the trans community has to become allies to eachother.
I was very honored to be the youngest keynote speaker the conference has ever had in it’s 11 years of existence.
As I grow older and become more and more exposed to society and to the transgender female to male community I am realizing how sexist some members of our community are.
How the fuck are you going to act sexist when you grew up as female/once ID’d as female???
The hypocrisy kills me and is literally making me sick.
If you are transitioning because are are a woman hater than you are transitioning for the wrong reason.
The only reason you should transition is because you feel like the opposite sex.
I hear trans guys talk shit about trans women and it’s really fucked up. Stop the hate. Love all the members in your community. Stick up for them and stop hating on each other.
I see sites where only masculine trans men are welcome and feminine trans guys are not welcome at all.
What ever happened to being a community?
Music video by Ryan Cassata performing Hands of Hate. ©: 2012 Artemendous Records, LLC.
Remembering Matthew Shepard, Tyler Clementi, Lawrence King, Jamey Rodemeyer, and all who passed due to the Hands of Hate.
BUY THE SINGLE: 10% of proceeds are donated to The Trevor Project
BUY THE OFFICIAL PINS TO STAND UP AGAINST BULLYING.
90% of the proceeds are donated to Make It Better For Youth
@STOPtheHOH - Follow us on twitter
Ryan Cassata, beloved trans-activist and singer-songwriter has been a popular guest and performer in Central Jersey (and around the country!) at schools and LGBTQ community groups over the last few months. He recently reached out to us at Make it Better to talk about teaming up with a fundraiser and awareness campaign.
If you don’t know Ryan, I personally think you are missing out. He’s a stellar speaker and musician, honest activist, and down-to-earth guy. One with a heart of gold, I might add. When Ryan contacted MIB4Y, he wanted to do something to help get our cause and commitment circulating. He has a new single (just released) and video (being released soon) called Hands of Hate, to which you can now listen. The message is aligned with the work we do at MIB4Y, and he has offered to highlight us in his upcoming performances with special edition of pins for the new single Hands of Hate.
Ryan has decided to donate all proceeds from the sales of the pins to help us out with the events and opportunities we provide for youth in the Monmouth/Ocean county region.
Support Ryan and us with a purchase of the special Make it Better for Youth pin! Visit the tumblrfor this partnership!
“HANDS OF HATE” is now available on itunes!! Please rate on itunes!! Click here to get it!
Please reblog and spread the word! When the “Soda Cans” Music Video hits 5,000 views I will upload the “Hands of Hate” Music Video.
The “Hands of Hate” Video is very tragic and touching. It goes over the stories of Matthew Shepard, Lawrence King, Tyler Clementi, & Jamey Rodemeyer. This video will inspire people to work for equality, peace, and love. This video will show everyone why it’s so important not to bully others. I’m really excited to share it with the world.
Spread the word by reblogging this post and the Soda Cans music video. Thank you!